Trying to stand in spiritual truth isn’t easy. Do you know how many times I’ve scrapped this blog and started a new one? Getting back to writing after being away for almost a year is difficult – especially because I don’t know what to say to you after I made the last apology for my absence.
I’m not making an excuse for being away. I like to think of it as more of an explanation. Writing this blog, I found myself trying to work more for others by pushing myself to put out more information, only to have situation after situation arise in my life to slow me down and keep me from having the time to do the things I wanted. I began to feel like I was a slave to the blog and I became resentful every time someone asked when I would be producing the next piece. The more I felt that way, the more I resisted writing it.
Eventually I took the hint and realized that working on myself is more important than anything else. Sharing the observations and what I had learned would help people more than just working hard trying to think of content that would be both interesting and humorous for people. I created this imbalance in myself with the self-induced pressure to be “live” even when I wasn’t in the highest integrity. Writing was making me angry, anxious and resentful. How’s that for honesty?
When I started writing this blog I intended it to be about my spiritual journey so I feel like it’s important for you to know that these “leaves of absences” I have taken have been part of that journey. What I realized was, that parts of my journey were not necessarily going to be unfold in time for me to write about them every few weeks. I didn’t want to make things up just to put content on a page and call it good. I want what I give you to be honest and real. That’s just me standing in my truth.
Forcing myself to write about something every couple of weeks just wasn’t working for me. Sometimes there is a flurry of spiritual activity in my life and I can find a million things to write about. Other times, my guides just want me in quiet contemplation. On days like those, I couldn’t raise Abraham Lincoln in a séance even if someone gave me a $1,000 Nordstrom gift card. (I would head for the shoe department)
Spirit is constantly making “adjustments” in my life. Some of these I can share with you and others I just can’t. No, I’m not afraid or embarrassed to share. Hell no. It’s just that many of these situations involve other people who have been sent to me for help and I don’t intend for this blog to be a rag mag.
It has always been my opinion, (and we all know that I have a hard time keeping my opinions to myself) that if someone is serving as a spiritual teacher, then that person should be able to share their own reality and learning experiences rather than to copy and share other people’s experiences. I didn’t want to be that “fake” person. Sure, I could make stuff up and keep you entertained but that’s not what I wanted. I wanted my experiences to be truthful and hopefully be of value to you in some way.
As the “spiritual revolution” broadens, and things like reiki healing, crystal healing and energy work become more popular, I find that more and more people are just jumping on the band wagon to make a buck. Even though I’m Jewish, far be it from me to be judgmental but seriously, this bugs the crap out of me.
It’s not enough to just say you are gifted or are a healer. Anyone can call themselves a reader, reiki practitioner or crystal healer. Sure it’s easier to just play a role than it is to BE who you say you are. To really stand in integrity you have to BE THE GIFT in service to others. This isn’t a 9 – 5 job. It’s a way of life and you’re on call 24/7. And helping someone else 24/7 has been a priority for me this last year. It’s kind of amazing the things you can learn about yourself from a four year old stranger. God shows up in your life in many forms.
I believe that anyone can do any kind of energy work. We all have the gift. But, there is a right way and a wrong way to go about it. Again, not judging, I’m just standing in my own truth. At the end of the day if you’re selling spirituality as a lie because you never took the time to actually start the journey and do the work well then, you aren’t going to be released from the 3d (3rd dimension) reality anytime soon. You see, God, the Universe, Source, whatever you call “It” knows your true heart. Besides, you can only hide from yourself for so long. Plus, I wouldn’t want to be you when Karma comes knocking on your door. Lying to people and pretending to be something you’re not when someone is genuinely seeking your help, is really bad juju.
One of the traps that I always try to avoid getting into is doing the complete opposite in my own life than those things that I teach. Unfortunately, as long as we live in this 3d world this is not going to be easy for me or anyone else. It’s hard for me to keep my big Jewish mouth shut. I know this about myself and embrace it. Sometimes things come out of my mouth before my brain even processes it. But, if I do call someone a dickhead or give them the finger, I don’t need someone to point out my shortcomings. I can already see them for myself. And the moment those nasty words are out of my mouth or my finger is in someone’s face, I’m already working on trying to control those behaviors so I don’t do it next time. I’ll let you know when (if) I succeed. Ha.
I do have moments when I float from 3d to 5d and those moments are coming more and more. If you think I’m bat shit crazy well, all I can say is that I’m in good company. Science has proven that our Universe is actually a Multiverse. Check out String Theory and Quantum Mechanics. Mind blown. Please just don’t ask me to explain it. Math class wasn’t my favorite. I was too busy writing my really, really, really mean math teacher’s obituary for a journalism class assignment. Oy, was she pissed when she found out. Journalism teacher was a snitch. Science class wasn’t much better. One of the more knowledgeable teachers I had would float a rubber ducky in his petri dish for our amusement. That’s what happens when you go to public school.
I spend more and more time in pursuit of the esoteric; of the unknown, of spirit. I dance to the beat of my own drum and I’m perfectly happy with that.
I don’t want to be one of those so called spiritual teachers who treat others badly while preaching unconditional love and forgiveness from the other side of my mouth. I don’t want to be that person who doesn’t take responsibility for my own actions. And if I do screw up, I want to be able to find the grace to recognize my mistakes and not repeat them without a bookcase falling on my head. Not an easy balance in this 3d world.
I also came to realize that being distracted with too much 3d will keep me rooted in 3d. We all will get to 5d at our own pace, but what I have learned is that I will get there much faster by focusing on 5d and focusing on myself first and sharing my own experiences rather than “performing” for others out of spiritual and metaphysical entertainment.
Thinking that you will attain enlightenment and transit into 5d simply because you are working in service is an illusion. Enlightenment is within the heart and can only be achieved through self-love and respect; by always standing in your own truth. It involves removing blocks and integrating traumatized shards of our soul that have separated from the truth and light. When you do the work, you suddenly “get it,” and you can then share that truth.
When you “get it”, your thoughts and actions seem to ooze truth and you become a shining beacon of light. You strive to treat others as if they were you. Hmmm…..maybe Christ did have a point with that whole “love your neighbor” thing.
You can no longer be triggered (as much – lol) and if you are triggered, you forgive and strive to keep going, learning each time how to react a different way. And, sometimes you just have to remove yourself from those who are not willing to work on their own projections.
You cannot enter 5d without mastering 3d. Mastering 3d means to be in a stillness within your heart, and that ironically means spending time with yourself and facing all that is not in alignment with love. It can be ugly because it means being truthful with yourself. It’s the most difficult task we can do, and just when we think that we are there, we will have an experience showing us just how much work we still need to do. The work continues until we merge with God once again.
Become who you really are, not what you think others want you to be, and you will draw just the right people into your reality that will support your personal timeline shift as well as contribute to the collective consciousness.
So to sum this all up for you if your head is spinning. Here are the Cliff’s Notes.
I’m writing again.
I can’t promise how often I will write.
If you can’t hang with that then you are not supposed to learn from me – I’m cool with that.
I’ve changed this blog site to more of a website and hope to do some interesting things in the future. Right now it’s a work in progress.
I’ve decided to do readings and healings from this site. I can do these in person, by telephone or by video chat. Please click on the “Readings and Healings” heading at the top of the site and then “Contact Me” to make an appointment.
I have created a Facebook Page called Cup of Kismet which will link back to this website. I will make postings there regularly.
My guides told me this would work much better for me because I can still reach people with my thoughts and inspirations without having to constantly write an entire blog post.
Please feel free to comment or ask a question on any post. I would love if you would share.
I would appreciate if you wouldn’t soft sell your services on my Facebook page but if you find a great shoe sale, please feel free to share!
If you are a reader, healer, artist, etc., please contact me privately. I would love to promote you. We are all unique at what we do. There is enough abundance in the Universe for all to prosper!
And last, I know you all miss me writing about my husband, Al. He’s finally using the email address I created for him a few years ago. He still has trouble with forwarding and photo sharing so he tells everyone to text their pics to me. It really lowers my vibration seeing dead deer pics, building project photos, or rashes in strange places on my phone. I try not to look. I give him my phone so he can look at the pictures and then I hit delete.
On a positive note, Al would be proud to tell you that not only has he figured the app out all by himself but he has over 500 followers on Pinterest. His pins are a combination of Martha Stewart, Jeremiah Johnson and Doomsday Preppers. He keeps things interesting.